Friday, August 8, 2008

The Light at the End of the Tunnel

I'm sitting here at my desk, anxious to leave for the last time. This is my last day of work here at UCSF and I'm definitely seeing the light at the end of the tunnel. Over the last several months, I have begun to realize that I'm seriously sleep deprived and it's affecting my mental and physical abilities. This could take some serious recovery time. I average only about 5 or 6 hours of sleep a night on account of the fact that I have to get up by 4:30 or 5 am everyday. This is bad for your health. A few months ago, Jared and I watched Band of Brothers and we were watching the episode where the American soldiers find a concentration camp deserted by the Nazi guards, but still inhabited by prisoners. Due to their severely starved state, the Americans immediately begin feeding the prisoners. An American doctor soon tells them they have to stop feeding the prisoners because their bodies can't handle all the food at once. I feel like this is what will happen to me if I start trying to get a normal amount of sleep. My body won't be able to handle it.

Still, I'm excited to see if my brain function will improve. Like, maybe I'll be able to think of the words I need when I need them. And maybe I won't do stupid things like hit the unlock button on my car remote to unlock the front door of the house (it doesn't work). And I'm thinking that my physical abilities will also improve. I think my soccer game will get better. What I'm really excited about is that I think getting more sleep will improve my Guitar Hero and Rock Band skills. I need to become an expert drummer!

I keep thinking about not having to get up early on Monday morning or for the rest of the week and it makes me so happy. I know. This post makes me sound like one of those people who needs tons of sleep and can sleep in until noon on the weekends. That's not me. In my past life I actually did very well with 7.5 to 8 hours of sleep, had a really hard time sleeping in past 9 and was very functional if I didn't get enough sleep for a few nights.

But, a couple years worth of sleep deprivation changes you. It's like being on crack. All you think about is sleeping and when will you get to go to sleep next and how can you get a few minutes of sleep here or a few minutes of sleep there. It's crazy! So, you can see why I'm excited. I'm about to enjoy the sweet taste of freedom! Anyone want to party this weekend?


Molly said...

Sweet! I'm so excited that you get to sleep! I looooooove sleeping. I think you need a big long sleep party this weekend.

We'll be in Tahoe, but I'll sleep in your honor.

So what's next on the work agenda?

Andrea said...

I too am a huge fan of sleep, and I hope that you get enough very soon!

k8esk8e said...

I like your crack analogy. That works really well for me. I'm so addicted to sleep. Just wait until you have a kid. Sleep deprivation takes on a whole new aspect. :) But you don't mind so much because all those awake hours are well spent. But oh, I love sleep. I miss sleep. Congratulations on your last day. My last day is in about 18 years. Can't wait. ;)

Hilary said...

And how do you know it's like being on crack?


Jenni said...

Hilary, you need to talk to my friend Kristen. She will tell you my whole life story about how I grew up in the midwest, ran away from home, lived on the streets and in boxes doing drugs, went to rehab, and now I am where I am today.

Hilary said...

Wow you have come really far! They should make a movie about you.

Jared said...

Hil, Jenni really has come a long way. But every morning when I wake up I ask myself if today will be the day when Jenni relapses. It's a rough life.

Kristina said...

Jenni's double life... It sounds like it would make a thrilling autobiography. Then I could write, The Friend I Didn't Know: memoirs of the childhood friend of the crack addict from teh midwest.

Jenni, I am so happy for you. Sleep little lamb...Sleep like you've never slept before.